Millennials Are Responsible For Killing Cows Now, Apparently

Millennials are responsible for anything and everything, apparently.

If you’ve been on social media for more than two minutes over the past two years or so you already know that millennials are responsible for killing literally everything. From actual boobs to golf, millennials are being accused of killing pretty much anything you can think of.

Next up on the list of things us millennials are killing are cows, specifically cows in Canada.

This all comes via the Ottawa Citizen:

On Jan. 1, Statistics Canada counted 11,850,000 total cows in Canada — already a 26-year low.

Now, U.S. authorities monitoring the Canadian cattle market suspect that by 2018 it will drop even lower, to 11,725,000.

“Canadian cattle farm numbers have continued to contract as ranchers retire out of the industry without a successor,” reads a new report by the United States’ Foreign Agricultural Service.

It also means that Canada’s ratio of cows to citizens remains in steep decline. In 1945, there were seven cows for every 10 Canadians. At the beginning of 2017, that ratio had dropped to only three cows per 10 Canadians.

Part of the recent decline in cattle numbers has been due to drought in the Canadian Prairies reducing the output of grazing land. Faced with keeping their herds alive with trucked-in feed, many farmers opted to send cows off to slaughter or sell them to the United States.

Cattle producers have also cited production being hamstrung by labour shortages. “Many readers, I’m sure, know first-hand how hard it is to find someone to work on a ranch or in a feedlot,” reads a 2015 article in Canadian Cattlemen.

In its report, the Foreign Agricultural Service placed special emphasis on what it called “producer attrition.” With old ranchers retiring and young ones not stepping up to replace them, there are simply fewer places in Canada raising cattle. Since 2005, the number of cattle farms has gone down by more than third.

If you read all of that in the same light I did, this shortage in cows in Canada is due to the fact literally no millennials want to go work on a farm raising cows and living that farm life. Say it ain’t so, people.

Oh, and let’s not just gloss over the fact that there are nearly 12,000,000 cows in Canada. That’s a lot of beef. If there are 12,000,000 in Canada that probably means there are about 12,000,000,000 in the state of Iowa or Oklahoma alone, right?

Everything from here on out will be blamed on millennials. The Patriots not repeating as Super Bowl champs this year, LeBron not getting another ring, Kylie Jenner being pregnant. It’s nobody’s fault but us millennials.